Kate Motaung

How things begin makes a huge difference in what happens after. If your first meeting with someone is unpleasant, that may mean that your relationship is marked by that negative interaction and may never recover. However, an inauspicious beginning doesn’t automatically mean that the ending is already written. After all, things change, and predicted outcomes can be averted. This all relates to attachment and how a person engages in relationships with others. Just because you have a particular attachment

Every relationship experiences challenges in one season or another, including the ones we consider healthy. When we encounter this with our teens, we need not be shaken by this. Our adolescents are emerging into adults. The transitions that they endure produce growing pains. Some, we see and are privy to, and others are private. While we experience the tumult of the teen years with our sons and daughters, it can feel as if we are going through our own

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him He endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition

You are sitting in your counselor's office. After weeks or months of tears and work you are well on your way to healing from your traumatic past. You have learned to identify triggers and work through panic attacks and anxiety. You are healing. It feels so good. Then comes the question, “Are you ready to forgive them?” All the work, all the healing comes down to this moment and you sit there, wondering how to answer. What forgiveness is

In looking at how to manage anger, it is helpful to better understand the three primary emotions. Psychologists normally agree that we all experience three basic emotions: love, anger, and fear. It is helpful to compare these to the three primary colors of red, yellow, and blue. Every color, shade, and hue we see is one of these three primary colors or some combination of them. In the same way, every feeling we experience in life is one of

Attachment-Based Therapy (ABT) is a form of psychotherapy that aims to address the issues people face as a result of their attachment styles. It is drawn from the influential work of British Psychologist, Psychiatrist, and Psychoanalyst John Bowlby’s attachment theory. We're only as needy as our unmet needs. – John Bowlby Attachment theory aims at explaining and predicting relational behaviors that people exhibit as a result of first relational encounters with caregivers. Bowlby argues that the closer and more

There are very few people in the world, if any, who are happy being disliked by other people. We are deeply social beings, and being disliked, whether in reality, or in our own minds, feels like forced isolation from others; who wants that? We all engage in people-pleasing at times. Relationships with other people are a key part of what makes our lives feel like they’re flourishing. That makes sense, because at the heart of the universe is love.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a form of depression, also called seasonal depression or major depressive disorder with seasonal patterns. It affects 5% of the adult population, most noticeably between January and February, and is more prominent in women than in men. It commonly begins between the ages 18-30. There are rarer cases of seasonal depression occurring in summer, sometimes called “summertime sadness.” Those who live in the northern hemisphere, where there are fewer daylight hours during the winter

Anger is one of many emotions that can and will be felt and experienced throughout life. Anger is what is called a primary emotion. A primary emotion is an emotion that is typically universally recognized and is displayed in the person’s body language and facial expressions and can be a result of anger issues. The other primary emotions are: sadness, disgust, surprise, joy, and fear. Despite what many people say, or even teach to their children, anger is not

Your mental and emotional health determines how well you bounce back from disappointments, hurts, trauma, and betrayal. It directly impacts your well-being. Mental and emotional health in turmoil can make a person physically ill. For example, suppose you develop anxiety from too much stress over a long period. In that case, you might experience headaches, high blood pressure, rapid heart rate, excessive sweating, insomnia, and irritability. To keep your well-being at optimal levels, consider setting goals for your mental

Feeling down after a breakup is a typical emotion. You invested time and energy into a relationship that did not work out. But some breakups hit harder than others. After a breakup, you may go through the stages of grief: shock (denial), anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Many of us get stuck in the depression stage of the process. This pervasive sadness steals our motivation and stops us from living life. However, depression after a breakup is not the

Depression is one of several mental health diagnoses that build momentum from the sadness, anger, and hopelessness that it deposits in those who experience it. Its symptoms influence our moods, behaviors, and bodies, leaving us as an exhausted, irritable shell of ourselves. It persuades us to trade our status as beloved sons and daughters for diminished esteem and enhanced distrust of God, ourselves, and others. As a result, we experience fragmented thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that isolate us from