Do you have a hard time controlling your anger? Is your anger ever disproportionate to the experience that caused it? Have you gotten into trouble (legal or otherwise) because of your anger issues? Feeling angry is a perfectly normal emotion, but when it spins out of control, anger can have a negative impact on your mental, emotional, and spiritual life—and unchecked anger devastates relationships. Fortunately, there are ways tell if anger is becoming a problem in your life.
Anger Management And Healing
Anger is a secondary emotion, which means that it is usually fueled by an underlying primary emotion such as fear or sadness. Counseling provides a safe space in which you can identify and deal with emotions underneath the surface. A counselor can also help you identify triggers of anger and together you can explore healthy ways of coping with anger. Anger management counseling offers practical solutions that can empower you to take control of your life and relationships.
Causes and Reasons for Anger
Remember, anger is a normal response to life’s frustrations. Anger only becomes a problem when you find yourself unable to express this emotion in a healthy way. If you are struggling to control your anger, chances are that there is a deeper problem that needs to be addressed. Some of the most common causes of anger issues include poor self-esteem, bottled emotions, and chronic stress. Persons who have suffered trauma, abuse, or grief are also more likely to face anger problems.
Anger and Relationships
There is no doubt that an anger issue takes a toll on a person’s ability to forge and maintain healthy, happy relationships, and it can be very challenging and even painful to care for someone with an anger issue. If you are suffering from an anger issue, you probably feel isolated and cut off—but it doesn’t need to be that way. Learning to channel anger effectively, and to confront a problem when it arises, will go a long way toward repairing and restoring your relationships.
By Leah Elliott,
Posted July 9th, 2018
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Have you ever heard the statement, “Anger is a second emotion”? This statement intrigues me. Thinking back into past experiences this statement rings true. Has there ever been a time in your life when you were first angry? Think about it. Most often sadness or hurt arises, then as a second emotion, anger follows. Anger is defined as a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility.
In sessions, I often use the example that anger is a ticking time bomb. Event after event, time after time eventually it explodes. Some people think, if they push it down and ignore it then it will not affect their life. Sadly it affects their life more. Eventually, as time builds and hurts get deeper, the wound becomes more like a scare and anger gets closer to the time of its explosion.
When we ask what is the heart of the matter of this emotion anger, we are asking how does it develop and how does it affect our heart and lives. How is anger so impactful? It changes our perspective, perhaps makes us lose hope and our trust in people. Perhaps it changes our desire to maintain and develop friendships.
It is carried around with us daily and we think we have left it in a box stored away till we want to unpack it again. Anger is heavy; it is sadness, disappointment, lost expectations, hurt and pain. It
By Spencer Fox,
Posted April 25th, 2018
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But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! – Galatians 5:2-23
One of the most common things I hear from men in my office is “… and then I just get so angry.” Anger seems to rest on our population like a plague, often creating a wake of devastation in the lives of families all over America. While many men experience anger, their loved ones, friends, and co-workers feel the ripple effect. Even that guy who you cut off in traffic.
Anger spreads, invades, and infects those around us. Further, when we try to bottle it down, it becomes like a pressure cooker ready to explode. As such, many treatments men try to use for themselves either end up having no effect or else the opposite effect. Treating anger in isolation, head on, can often be a futile task.
Imagine this: you are standing in a cove on the beach, and I instruct you to stop the waves from coming in. How could you accomplish such a task? Would you stand in front of the waves and tell them to stop? Would you lean into the waves and use your body to block their path? These attempts would likely yield poor results as the water will find any route around you.
No matter how quick you move, how much space you can take up, the
By Tressa Borchardt,
Posted November 15th, 2017
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What does it mean to actually forgive someone who has wronged us in some way? It seems like such a simple concept that we are taught even at a young age. When someone says ‘I’m sorry,’ we say ‘I forgive you.’ And as Christians we are often taught to grant forgiveness even if that ‘I’m sorry’ never comes. But what is forgiveness beyond the spoken words?
What is Forgiveness?
Forgiveness is releasing the ‘right’ you may feel to be angry and resentful, laying down all claims to retribution. It is relinquishing any guilt, punishment, or debt that someone may owe you.
Forgiveness seeks pardon, not punishment of the other person. Forgiveness carries the price of surrendering revenge, but the reward is worth it. God began by forgiving us, and He invites us to forgive others.
There are many misconceptions about what it means to forgive, as well as what it means about ourselves as the forgiver. These messages can come from social media, Hollywood, or even our own friends and family.
Ultimately as Christians, we can find clarity in the Scriptures to sort out “What is forgiveness, really?”
Common Myths About Forgiveness
The following are a few myths that the world tends to portray about forgiving.
Myth: Forgiveness is letting people run all over you
When we choose to forgive someone who has sinned against us, it is not an act of condoning hurtful actions. It simply declares that we have made a choice to let go of the anger